There is a medieval legend about a man who observed three stone masons at their work. He asked them what they were doing. The first said, “I am laying stones.” The second said, “I am building a wall.” The third said, “I am raising a cathedral!” It was the third who had a an expansive vision for the outcome of his task. He understood something of the value of his contribution.
If you pose that question to fathers, you might get similar replies. “I am earning a living.” “I am putting bread on the family table.” “I am rearing young lives for God.” Theologian Merrill C. Tenney captured the thought in lines he wrote to his son.
To you, O son of mine, I cannot give a vast estate of wide and fertile lands/ But I can keep for you the whilst I live, unstained hands.
I have no treasure chest of gold refined, no hoarded wealth of clinking, glittering pelf/ I give to you my hand and heart and mind — all of myself.
I can exert no mighty influence to make a place for you in men’s affairs/ But lift to God in secret audience unceasing prayers.
I cannot, though I would, be always near to guard your steps with the parental rod/ I trust your soul to Him who holds you dear, your father’s God.
That last phrase, “your father’s God,” reminds me of James 1:17, where we learn that “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”
I think this is an important truth for Fathers’ Day. God wants us to know him as a father, a good and generous father. Some people have trouble with this idea because their human fathers were neglectful, critical or abusive. Some people (an increasing number these days) grow up without a father in their lives at all. For some people memories of “father” are buried so deeply inside that it may be terrifying or painful to bring them out.
Even those of us whose fathers were kind and good would be reluctant to say that they were perfect. No human dad is a perfect father.
Christian writer Grant Swank, Jr. told about having a bit of a tussle with his 7-year-old son before bed. “We were not seeing eye-to-eye on the matter, and I felt as if the evening had been rather botched up. I did not like the feeling at all.” As his boy lay with his face turned away, the father sat on the edge of the bed for the usual bedtime prayer, wondering if he should turn it into a mini-lecture. It was hard to find the right words.
He said his boy knew he had done wrong and he was wondering what approach his dad would take. Would it be justice, or mercy?
So he closed his eyes to pray. “Dear Lord, thank you for my boy. You know how much I love him. He means the world to me. Thank you for giving him to us. May he always serve you. Now we thank you for this night’s sleep. Be near us all. And may tomorrow be a good day. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
Swank wrote, “Then he swung his body around toward me and hugged me tightly around the neck. His eyes were closed tight.”
“Daddy, do you love me even when I’m bad?” he asked in my ear. “Yes,” I answered. “I always love you.”
“With that he said one of the most encouraging statements known to mankind: ‘You’re the best daddy in the world.'”
“Right then I promised myself something. Yes, there is still much room for improvement as far as my being a father is concerned. I have goofed from time to time Yet that night I told my memory to hold on to the innocent testimony of a little boy to a father who was sincerely trying. ‘You’re the best daddy in the world.'”
Our heavenly Father invites us to come to him as a Father who loves perfectly and who gives the best and most perfect gifts, the gifts of himself, the gift of his Son, the gift of his Spirit, the gifts of salvation and eternal life. He is never neglectful, abusive or critical. God is the only perfect father.
James tells us our heavenly Father does not change like a shifting shadow. He is consistent and reliable. He is faithful to his promises. His love never stops. The next verse (James 1:18) says, “He chose to give us birth by the word of truth.” God makes us his children through spiritual rebirth. This happens when we believe the word of the gospel concerning his Son’s death and resurrection for our sins.
We who are far from perfect as earthly fathers can try to be more like our heavenly Father: consistent, generous, and merciful. We can be fully present in our children’s lives, giving them the best gifts we can give them, the gift of ourselves, and the gift of God’s salvation.
Pastor Randy Faulkner